THE ONE WAY
TICKET TO ASIA
Part 3/5

so after my arrival and living in the loft for one month my lease was
up and i was talking to celine about where i should move next . she
suggested that i live w/ her and her family in a nearby city . and it
made sense on so many levels, the first being i spent so much on that
loft that i didn't want to travel much because i felt like i wouldn't enjoy
it, which is totally backwards and defeats the purpost of traveling . but
being w/ them, how could i pass that up ? besides rent free and
having live in helpers cook three delicious meals a day it was about the
experience of living w/ a family and having that whole dynamic, also
having the ability to travel outside of manila . it's very cliche when people
travel they always say, "wow life will never be the same", "or that was
the most magical time of my life" i feel like it is an 'experience game'
or something . people on social media always seem to pose w/ local
kids and act like they are really getting into that cultures groove...
when in reality we go there as tourists and mostly do tourists things . (srry)
but now, i had an oppurtunity to do something i will never have the chance
again perhaps . i came here alone, i met a girl, we fell for eachother,
and the family and i embraced one another . they housed me, took care
of me, they showed me respect, kindness, and love . it was beautiful :)

above is celine playing games w/ her sister ella and her cousin
rafa, whom i am obsessed w/ he kinda became my world

ok i'm about to go off on the clubs, i did a lil' on instagram
and it got me into some trouble but whatev it's something that
interest me and i like to speak about . philippines... your clubs suck
balls, you have the worst nightlife i have ever experienced in my
life, congrats . i don't even know where to start ? it's like, should i
talk about how wannabe westernized it is ? how it resembles vegas,
(which to me already the worst in the US) but they do it even more wrong ?
how there are TV's in the club, yes, there are fucking massive tv's that
loop advertisements the whole time you are there . also NOBODy dances,
there is nowhere for them to do it !!! there are tables everywhere and the
designated "dancefloor" has very high tables that resemble stools for you
to chill and drink at . so basically it's just an extended table area and there
is no dancefloor . and please do not get me started on the music... oh my
god . i honestly thought they were playing a joke or being ironic . all the songs
are american pop songs but EDM remixes, so if there is that ONE person
who wants to dance anyway they are completely fucked because the songs
are god awful . for some reason the biggest song out there is "magic - Rude"
which is what we listened to around 9 months ago... to sum it up you have
a bunch of confused people buying tables and drinks, fist pumping to arianna
grande edm music and shouting to eachother thinking they are having
a blast . it is a truly pathetic sight . while I was there they had this place open
called "the palace", it was the biggest club in all of asia . sidenote: for some
reason filipinos think haveing the biggest thing is cool, they have the biggest
mall, indoor arena, and club, kinda weird . anywho.. this new palace club
had the same layout as every other club . they think it's a production,
the tv's, the tables, the pop music . they think they have all the tools
for a great nite out, but in reality, it's like being in a mall . biggest bumer

one cool thing is they have pizza and food, although
this particular pizza does not look that appetizing

in her neighborhood they lock all the surrounding gates for
protection . when we get back at 3-4am we have to find a way
in . this time celine fit under the gate, i tried but am a little thicker
than her so i had to hop it . my pants are made out of wool therefore
they don't flex so i had to take them off to jump it (photo below)

i saw so many people wear these comme des garcon play t-shirts
everywhere and then i started going shopping an noticed that almost
every low key store (i kid you not) has their knockoff version of them .
they just throw that heart w/ eyes on every kind of shirt they can find

i was like, "fuck it i want one" so i paid 8$ for one and didn't bother
to try it on . so i got home and it looked like a baby t on me :P

another janky philippines moment, we caught the last showing of
interstellar at this sketchy mall and when we got out around midnight
all the lights were out in the ENTIRE mall . i took this photo w/ a flash
so you can see how dark it is . everyone was using their camera phone
lights to guide themselves out is was so ghetto and crazy

we went out on three trips together, the first one was to
cebu and bohol to see the chocolate mountains and see the world
famous tarsier monkeys . i photo'd these dorky koreans wearing
the exact same outfit . i later learned they do this because if they
lose one another they can go up to someone and say, "he/she is wearing
what i am wearing have you seen them ??" i'm serious, that's what
it is for . if i was either of them i would get "lost" on purpose just to get away

this is the philippino hero, no not manny pacquiao, the OG hero .
he is famous because magellan who is one of the world's first greatest
explorers stepped up on the philippines island trying to boss us around
and the leader of cebu lapu-lapu, (the handsome man photo'd above)
killed him as they faught in shallow water, pretty epic .

on the right is magellan's cross, a tourist landmark to see .
but it is encassed in another wood for protection so you don't
even get to see it, which makes it pretty lame right ?

we got to our hotel in bohol and they had an authentic
louie-vitton luxury bathroom rug, very nice :P

we ate at this place called, "old west bakery", where all the staff
are deaf . you had to either write your order down for them or
hand sign it, which they taught some on the menu, pretty cute

we rented a scooter and after about 5 minutes it just starts to pour
rain everywhere . we returned to the hostel and i was pissed off because
we already rented the bike for the day . celine takes a walk an hour later
and tells me to look outside... the streets, they were completely dry and
scorching hot . nothing was wet anymore, in ONE HOUR . it's almost disbelievable
from looking at the above photo right ? that's how fast and rapid and uncanny the
weather is out there, if it rains, just wait 30 mins

A video posted by Jesse Somera (@jessesomera) on

 

the video above i think was us riding back the first time it started
to rain . we set out again for the monkeys and the hills an hour later
and on the way there i totally blew it and crashed . the roads were
wet and yadda yadda yadda i made a mistake . i'll never forget the
moment when we both went flying from the bike and i was tumbling
i saw her tumbling and the face she was making... even now it has remained
emblazoned on my mind . it was pure pain and discomfort . as soon as i
could stand i rushed over to her and started screaming if she was ok .
i remeber how bad i felt for her, i felt like i let her family down, they trusted
me w/ the safety of her and i blew it . not a good feeling . i still cannot
believe that, although we got majorly fucked up we didn't break any bones
or fuck up our faces . i thank the adventure gods

before and after...

on our way home, waiting, just waiting for the next one !

 

 

 

back to main page